“The Annoying Friend” by Kyla McFarlin, 16
I've always had this super annoying friend. She followed me everywhere and never failed to interrupt at the worst possible moments. Despite the frustration she's brought me, I had to learn to live with her, because deep down inside I knew she wasn’t going anywhere.
Her name is Sickle Cell.
No one else could see or feel her, but me. I always wanted people to see me before they saw her because I was embarrassed of her. The truth is I did a pretty good job at hiding her from the public but I could never hide Sickle Cell from myself. Every day I wake up, take a shower and brush my teeth, I'm reminded of my condition. Especially when I peer into the mirror and see my yellow tinted eyes. I could never escape the sudden ache that took place in my right arm or the changes my body experienced during various temperatures. I couldn’t even escape the sudden tiredness that consumed my body in the middle of anatomy class. I guess I could say thank you for her consistency since I knew when she was coming; third period. One moment I’m awake and the next I'm fighting sleep. The only thing that kept me awake was my desire to be so much more than just my Sickle Cell. These were all silent battles, Sickle Cell and I were alone. There was no one to go to, there was no one who understood us.
Many people would probably ask why I didn't talk about it with friends. However, most people don’t understand how difficult it is to tell peers that you're sick in an incurable way. I have always sought to prevent Sickle Cell from defining my identity or evoking pity from others. This was always my motive, so I always concealed her. Of course it was hard at times to keep such a big secret, so I had to lie. She was never okay with the lies I told, I could tell it was hurting her. Sickle Cell especially hated blood drives at school because she knew those were the days she would be hidden the most. Many of my peers would ask me why I never participated even though gift cards were used as an incentive. I stuck with the same story, “my fear of needles” which in hindsight wasn't a lie.
Although Sickle Cell and I were seemingly close, we did have our differences. She hated blood drives; I hated science class. Every time I saw the title, “Sickle Cell” appear on the white board or a PowerPoint, I slumped in my chair. It was getting harder to keep her silent these days, especially since my annoying friend always wanted to speak up. She wasn’t even the worst part of the lecture, it was the symptoms that caused me so much agony because I knew those bad things could happen to me at any given moment. To make matters worse, students would loosely use the word Sickle Cell. At one moment, a student yelled out sickle cell as an answer to something that wasn't related to the subject matter. They were ignorant and asked disdainful questions at times like, “Is Sickle Cell contagious?”, “Do White people get Sickle Cell?” or “Is Sickle Cell only found in Africa?” Questions and interjections like these made me reach my boiling point. How could I sit back and allow them to be so wrong about her when I knew the truth? Even though she was annoying at times, she still was my friend and I needed to advocate for her. It was no longer just about me, it was about us.
That was the last time I sat through a Sickle Cell lesson and kept my mouth shut. I did what I considered the unthinkable. For my final project in microbiology, we had the opportunity to give a lesson about any disease, and I chose to teach the class about Sickle Cell. For so long I wanted to be free from my big secret. I was contemplating my decision for a long time and gave it much thought. When my teacher asked for volunteers to go first, my hand shot up in the air. I wasn't sure if it was me or Sickle Cell who threw that hand up, but I’m glad it happened. When I walked up to the board to grab the red whiteboard marker, my hand quivered at the thought of true freedom, my body shivered with nerves as I wrote out the title I once dreaded: “Sickle Cell”. My friend finally got the proper introduction she deserved. She could now finally step out of the shadows no longer behind me, but now right by my side. From that moment on people no longer just saw me, they saw us. Nervous studders and hesitant presentations turned into confident and powerful strides to the front of the classroom. My body no longer shivered when I spoke about my friend. She became my true best friend and I learned to appreciate and embrace her. When I spent time and got to know her, I learned that she was special in so many ways. When I look into the mirror, I no longer see those ugly yellow eyes. I now recognize a beautifully resilient person that was always there. Even though we made remarkable progress, like any relationship, the work is never done. We still have to work on her manners (“like interrupting at the worst moments possible”). Nevertheless, she is my other half and I will always love her.